Whoops…..Our Plane Is Missing!!

£13,000 police drone lost after crashing into River Mersey

An aerial drone hailed by police as the latest tool in the fight against crime was declared lost after crashing into the River Mersey.

The craft, which was launched in Merseyside four years ago in a hail of publicity, now apparently lies at the bottom of the river.

Because of force budget cuts, senior officers have also decided to consign any plan to replace it to the depths of the ocean.

Police lost control of the £13,000 Unmanned Aerial Vehicle (UAV) while operating it from the Riversdale Police Social Club, in Aigburth, on a "routine training exercise".

Bosses spoke to the red-faced officers after the incident.

The drone went AWOL on a Wednesday afternoon at the club, which is used for police functions and celebrations.

The Mersey is a mere 500 yards from the force’s playing field, close to Liverpool Cricket Club.

The drone was high above the Aigburth club when police said it suddenly lost battery power.

The UAV tried to perform a safety landing in adverse weather conditions, but the craft – which was a long distance from those operating it at the time – crashed into the Mersey.

A search was carried out, but the drone was given up lost.

The force was compensated by insurers for its £13,000 value but senior officers decided against replacing it due to the financial climate.

A police spokesman said: "Initially the force identified the potential benefits of a UAV within operational policing.

"But during its use officers recognised certain technical and operational issues, including staff training costs and the inability to use it in all weather conditions.

"The use of the UAV by officers requires a considerable amount of training, skill and practice.

"Officers cannot operate the UAV without first completing an intensive training course."

Merseyside was the first force in the UK to use a drone to carry CCTV cameras to monitor trouble hotspots and film crowds.

Weighing the same as a bag of sugar, the "spy in the sky" could land almost anywhere, allowing police to scan the most remote of locations.

Officers said it would help the force’s antisocial behaviour team and it was hoped it would prove effective monitoring large-scale events, traffic congestion and even help in firearm operations.

But it had a somewhat chequered history during its four years in use. In February last year, the drone celebrated its first arrest, helping to locate a suspected car thief who escaped from a car following a police chase in Litherland.

Its thermal technology was integral in finding the man hiding by a canal in thick fog. But later that month, police fell foul of the law by using their aerial device without an appropriate licence.

The drone was subsequently taken out of service temporarily while the correct licence was obtained.

The Civil Aviation Authority, which launched an investigation, took no further action and an appropriate certificate was subsequently granted.

A Merseyside police spokesman added: "Full aerial cover and support is provided by the North West Air Operations Group. "We remain committed to providing the best policing service possible to the people of Merseyside and will always use all the resources available to us in order to tackle crime."

Duck Or Grouse!!

Vandals target giant inflatable duck

Queensland water police have recovered a five-metre inflatable yellow duck found floating down the Brisbane River.

Police tried to tow it back to West End for this afternoon’s cancer research fundraiser, The Great Brisbane Duck Race.

Vandals had cut free and slashed the duck before letting it loose.

Organiser Simone Plunkett says she is not sure if the duck is in any condition to be used as a finishing post.

"We think someone has had a little bit of fun with him overnight… and the water police found him heading out to sea earlier this morning," she said.

Later, Ms Plunkett said the big inflatable duck did not make it.

"We thought we’d actually been pretty lucky because the duck has been out on the river for six weeks and we were surprised it hadn’t got a hole in it or deflated or someone might have shot a pellet it at," she said.

"But it helped serve its purpose so the race will still go on."

Never Too Old!!

92-year-old refused service at off-licence

A 92-year-old woman was refused service at an off-licence because she was unable to prove she was over 18.

Diane Taylor, who is a great-grandmother, was unable to provide photo identification at a One Stop Shop in Essex while trying to purchase some alcohol for her son.

"It seemed so stupid, I thought the cashier was complimenting me," Taylor told The Mirror. "But then I realised that she was being serious so I pulled out my bus pass, my blood donor’s card but it was no good, she said she wanted proof of age.

"I was so taken aback I didn’t know what to do."

Taylor said she refused to believe she looked under the age of 25 and has since received an apology from a spokesperson for One Stop Shop.

Not A Thong To Wear!

Police searching for pink bikini burglar

Police in the US state of Indiana have reached out to the public for help in tracking down a bikini-clad male burglar.

Indianapolis Metropolitan Police have released surveillance footage of a man breaking into a daycare centre on October 20 and trying on a range of swimsuits, eventually settling for a pink-coloured number in which to explore the building.

The offender, who changed into his regular clothes before leaving the business, is described as white or Hispanic and sports a long, black ponytail.

Authorities released the video as part of an appeal for information, but censored some of the footage to "obscure unidentified parts sticking out of the bikini".

Police report that the man fled the premises after triggering a motion-sensitive alarm.
Employees at the centre are said to be unsure as to whether anything was taken.

It’s Only A Game?

Man stabbed over alleged Monopoly cheating

There is no card in Monopoly that advises a player to stab another.

There is, however, one that orders you to go to jail.

And that’s where a New Mexico woman found herself after a game of Monopoly with her boyfriend and 10-year-old son turned bloody.

Convinced he was cheating, Laura Chavez, 60, of Santa Fe, N.M., grabbed a kitchen knife and repeatedly stabbed Clyde "Butch" Smith.

According to the arrest warrant obtained by the Santa Fe New Mexican newspaper, "[The boy] stated his grandma, Laura, and [her boyfriend] were both drinking a beer from the same can while playing the game (of Monopoly.) [The boy] further advised that during the time they were playing the game, his grandma and [her boyfriend] started to argue because she thought [the boyfriend] was cheating at Monopoly."

The paper reported that after police responded to a call at the home in southwest Santa Fe Wednesday, they found 48-year-old Smith "bleeding heavily from his head and right wrist area."

Chavez – who police say admitted stabbing the man – was arrested and charged with aggravated battery on a household member with a deadly weapon, battery upon a peace officer, assault upon a peace officer and resisting or evading a police officer.

Smith, meanwhile, remained hospitalized late Wednesday but was in stable condition.

Taco-Bell…Ding Dong!!

Police link Taco Bell fire to irate customer

A Taco Bell customer angry over too little meat on his extra large chalupas may have tried to set an Albany, Georgia restaurant on fire, police said on Friday.

A police officer spotted a small fire burning in the drivethru of the Taco Bell early on October 23, Albany police said.

The officer discovered a melted plastic container with liquid still burning inside, police said.

Earlier that morning, a male customer called the restaurant, complaining that his chalupas did not have enough meat on them, according to police.

When a restaurant employee told him that the store was about to close and that he would have to return the next day, he allegedly replied, "That’s alright, I’ll just come up there and redecorate the place."

The fire in the drivethru caused only minor damage to the building and there has not yet been an arrest in the case, Albany police said.

Donkey Love??

Zimbabwean man claims prostitute turned to donkey

A Zimbabwean man has told a court that he hired a prostitute who during the night transformed into a donkey, and that he is now "seriously in love" with the animal, according to state media.

"I think I am also a donkey. I do not know what happened when I left the bar, but I am seriously in love with (the) donkey," Sunday Moyo told the court, according to The Herald newspaper.

Moyo, 28, was arrested in the town of Zvishavane, about 185 miles south of the capital Harare on Sunday.

He said he had paid $25 for a prostitute, and was surprised Sunday morning when he heard people accusing him of having sex with a donkey.

Moyo has been charged with bestiality and remanded in custody. The court has ordered him to undergo a mental examination, The Herald said.

Lifeguard’s Are Awesome!!

Poole lifeguards in Hitler YouTube video

The RNLI has apologised for what it described as an "offensive" video made by members of its Dorset lifeguard team and posted on the internet.

The video, entitled "Lifeguards Awesome", features Poole lifeguards in uniform on Sandbanks beach.

It includes simulated sex scenes and an impersonation of Adolf Hitler.

The RNLI said it was "extremely dismayed" by the content of the film and had asked for it to be removed from YouTube.

One scene during the nine-minute long video sees a lifeguard offering sex education "advice" which includes references to violence towards women.

‘Shameful behaviour’

Spencer Gammond, head of external communications for the RNLI, said: "The Royal National Lifeboat Institution is extremely dismayed by the offensive content of this video and apologises unreservedly to anyone who has seen it.

"Immediately after this was drawn to our attention we contacted YouTube, and the unknown person who uploaded the video, to demand its removal.

"We are carrying out a thorough investigation and will take disciplinary action against those who have used RNLI resources inappropriately and shown such disregard for the public, our supporters and our charity’s good name."

He added that the "shameful behaviour by a very small minority" was not representative of the RNLI’s 900 lifeguards.

RNLI GET A LIFE

The “Free” French??

France Blocked Police Misconduct Videos

French authorities have ordered the country’s Internet service providers to ban a site developed to allow people publish videos of suspected police misconduct.

Famous copwatch Nord Paris I-D-F started experiencing good traffic after the civilians began posting video footage of policemen beating people up, or otherwise behaving not professional.

Alliance Police Nationale, the country’s police union, has welcomed the court decision that banned the access to this website, saying that demonstrating video footage of the country’s policemen being violent would only encourage people to be violent to the cops in respond. In fact, if a person knows he or she is going to get a good kicking while being arrested, they are more likely to make an attempt to either run away or fight back. At the same time, fighting back doesn’t look like something that French policemen like a lot, because it usually makes it harder to hit a victim.

According to the media reports, the judges have considered the website a threat to the integrity of the police forces. That’s why they have taken such decision. A reasonable question remains the following: is being staffed by psychopathic bullies looking forward to beating up suspects not a threat to the police?

Industry experts agreed that this particular court order was an obvious will by the county’s authorities to control and censor the civilians’ new Internet public area. Strangely enough, for a country that inspired the United States, France doesn’t have any kind of equivalent to the American First Amendment that prevents the authorities from making any legislation that would abridge the freedom of speech or of the media. On the other hand, France did have legislation that allowed to cut the heads off whoever they liked, so maybe cutting off sites is the next step to it.

It’s a Frenchman’s Problem!!

French study reveals hard facts about penis size

Boffins in France have published details about the size of the average French penis — so garlic munching men don’t worry about the size of le tackle.

Researchers at Paris-based National Academy of Surgery hope the study will curb a recent rise in penis enlargement surgery.

And so to the numbers… the academics say the "normal" penis is between 9 and 9.5cm when flaccid and between 12.8 and 14.5cm when erect.

Girth of the typical French member is between 8.5 and 9cm circumference when as soft as a floppy beret and then 10 to 10.5cm when doing a baguette impression.

A statement from the National Academy of Surgery said: "The feeling of having an insufficiently-large penis can be a source of anxiety and psychological suffering for a man.

"There has been an increase in demand for penis-enlargement operations in recent years, due to what some people call ‘locker-room syndrome’.

"But these lengthening procedures may have only limited results and could have a risk of certain complications, in particular regarding erections."