Boghound's World News

A Humorous Look At News Events And Life Around The World

Archive for October, 2009

You Can See The Slime!!!

Posted by Boghound on October 31, 2009


MPs’ expenses: Tony McNulty allowed to keep £60,000

Tony McNulty has been allowed to keep almost £60,000 he claimed in expenses for a house where his elderly parents lived just eight miles from the “main” home he shares with his wife.

The former Home Office minister was criticised by a formal inquiry for allowing his parents to live rent free at taxpayers’ expense and ordered to repay more than £13,000.

But the Parliamentary committee, who decide MPs’ punishments ruled he should be allowed to keep the majority of the money claimed on the home. The official investigation said it was “reasonable” for the taxpayer to help fund Mr McNulty’s parents’ house as it was in his constituency and could be designated as his second home.

Yet Mr McNulty himself admitted he only stayed there for a maximum of 66 nights a year. He spent the rest of the time at the nearby £900,000 house he shares with his wife Christine Gilbert, the head of Ofsted

So……….Let’s get this straight…….The Labour Party is for the working class…….The Tory Party is for the toffs and The Liberal Party….Well they don’t know who they represent…..But which members of which party has “claimed” for the most and which party member’s wife’s hold high office under their maiden names so the general public don’t “catch on” to what is going on……..YEH RIGHT…..Labour represent the “The Working Man”……LABOUR REPRESENT THEMSELVES AND ALWAYS HAVE DONE!!!!!

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Those Pesky Bumper Stickers

Posted by Boghound on October 30, 2009


“For a small town, there sure are a lot of assholes!”
“If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport!”
“Honk to see finger!”
“Better a blow job, than no job!”
“My Other Ride is YO MOMMA!”
“Work hard, the people on welfare depend on you!”
“I used to have a handle on life…but it broke off.”
“Jesus loves you…but everyone else thinks you are an asshole.”
“Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted.”

“WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.”
“A woman need a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”
“My son is inmate of the month!”

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Give It Some Bottle!

Posted by Boghound on October 29, 2009


Rags-to-riches tramp bags fortune in bottles

A 63-year-old homeless Russian man has gone from street life to stock market trader after collecting thousands of empty booze bottles for cash, a popular Russian tabloid reported on Tuesday.

Pictured in a majestic purple suit and matching violet jewelry, Leonid Konovalov told the Tvoi Den paper he collected around 2,000 bottles a day over the past year since the economic downturn hit Russia last autumn.

“Russians are drinking a little bit more due to the crisis, and this helped me get out of the rubbish dump,” said Konovalov, an ex-engineer from the industrial city of Kemerovo in eastern Siberia who has spent the last 20 years living in a tip.

Russia’s many homeless are often seen rooting through rubbish for bottles and tins, which they can trade for money. A glass bottle can fetch about 2 rubles ($0.06).

The bearded former tramp said he was encouraged by his two grandchildren to take risks on the stock market and said his first transaction was a 50,000 euro ($74,120) share-purchase.

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Students…What a Pain!

Posted by Boghound on October 28, 2009


Cornish ‘terrorists’ declare war on students

A self-proclaimed “terrorist” group from Cornwall, dubbed the “Ooh-Arr A”, has launched a campaign in protest at the influx of students into the county.

Anti-student slogans signed by the The Cornish Republican Army, also known as the “Farmer Bin Ladens”, have appeared at an open day event at University College in Falmouth.

The group is said to be angry that a proposed 231 new flats will be made into student accommodation, rather than being made available to local residents.

The graffiti, sprayed at the nearby Penryn railway station, said: ”Penryn has had enough of students – CRA’.

Local councillor Geoff Brown said: ”I think it’s a great pity that we have had this vandalism. We welcome students in Cornwall.

”It seems a great pity that some people aren’t broad-minded enough to accept that.”

Deputy mayor Ted Wilkes added: ”The graffiti is very childish. It makes bad impression.”

CRA members, who want independence from the United Kingdom, have previously threatened to fire bomb the restaurants of Rick Stein and Jamie Oliver.

The group has also claimed responsibility for burning down an empty warehouse and two derelict offices.

……………and who can blame them….Students in this society seem to get everything handed to them on a plate……….Including Microsoft products at huge discounts, cheap banking and rail travel….Let the buggers pay full price!!!!!!

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Burger Fight!!!

Posted by Boghound on October 27, 2009


Man charged with criminal damage to hamburgers

A man called Stephen Morgan has been charged with criminal damage to two hamburgers worth £5 after becoming involved in an alleged doorstep dispute with a fast food firm.

Morgan, 31, was arrested and taken from his home in handcuffs at the weekend after his family’s order with their local pizza parlour in Loughor, near Swansea, arrived minus two burgers.

The incident began when Morgan was at home in with partner Michelle Owen on Saturday evening.

The couple, who have two children, planned to stay in and watch ITV1’s The X Factor with other family members.

A dispute is alleged to have started after an order of food with a local pizza parlour arrived without the, no doubt, tasty hamburgers.

Mr Morgan claims it was agreed the group should wait for the rest of the order, he told the South Wales Evening Post.

A dispute is alleged to have started with a delivery man who came to the house later, and £15 compensation was eventually paid out, he claims.

What follows remains unclear, however police visited the address later that evening and arrested Mr Morgan on suspicion of robbery.

He was taken to Swansea Central police station where he was questioned about the incident and held overnight.

A South Wales Police spokesman confirmed that a 31-year-old man was arrested on Saturday evening and has since been charged with causing criminal damage to food valued at £5.

…………..No doubt it will go to court costing the British taxpayer thousands in court fees!!!!!!!

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Eat a Dog…Save the Planet!!!!!!!

Posted by Boghound on October 25, 2009


Pet dogs as bad for planet as driving 4x4s, book claims

Owners should consider doing without, downsizing or even eating their pets to help save the planet, according to a new book.

It claims that the carbon footprint left by domesticated animals is out of proportion to the size of their paws.

A medium-sized dog has the same impact as a Toyota Land Cruiser driven 6,000 miles a year, while a cat is equivalent to a Volkswagen Golf.

New Zealand-based authors Robert and Brenda Vale base their findings on the amount of land needed to grow food for pets ranging from budgerigars to cats and dogs.

They say an average Collie eats 164kg of meat and 95kg of cereals a year, giving it a high impact on the planet.

But a pair of rabbits can produce 36 young annually, which would provide 72kg of meat and help decrease the owner’s carbon footprint.

Mr Vale, an architect who specialises in sustainable living, said: “There are no recipes in the book. We’re not actually saying it is time to eat the dog.

“We’re just saying that we need to think about and know the (ecological) impact of some of the things we do and that we take for granted.”

He explained that sustainability issues require us to make choices which are “as difficult as eating your dog”.

Mr Vale added: “Once you see where cats and dogs fit in your overall balance of things, you might decide to have the cat but not also to have the two cars and the three bathrooms and be a meat-eater yourself.”

………so my Wolfies will go down well with a large portion of fries……..FUCK YOU…..I think not!!!!!

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Tear a strip off!

Posted by Boghound on October 24, 2009


Stripping woman fails to avoid jerky arrest

Stripping to you underwear apparently doesn’t absolve you of stealing beef

A woman’s attempt to avoid arrest over shoplifting some beef jerky proved ineffective, as it turned out that stripping in front of policemen won’t stop them from arresting you.

Kicking them in the groin also doesn’t help you cause, apparently.

The woman, identified as Julia E Laack of Sheboygan, Wisconsin, was arrested at her home after she allegedly stole the beef jerky and a lighter from a convenience store. When officers arrived at her house, she began by swearing at her children, then stripped to her underwear.

She told officers: ‘You can’t arrest me as I am going to be naked now.’

Laack then kicked one of the officers in the groin and spat at another as they attempted to prove that they could, in fact, arrest her.

She then decided to round off her evening by mooning from the back window of the squad car as she was taken to the police station.

Preliminary tests showed that she had a blood alcohol level of 0.112 percent, significantly above Wisconsin’s 0.08 percent drink-drive limit.

……………Strange…………….She wasn’t driving a car!!

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Typical!!!!!

Posted by Boghound on October 23, 2009


Father backs son who refused to show head respect

A new head teacher has provoked a “respect” debate among parents after ordering pupils to stand up when he enters a classroom.

Kevin Harrison, 55, who joined Macclesfield High School earlier this month, said the rule allowed him to check uniforms quickly and was a sign of respect.

However, the father of a pupil, sent home for refusing to stand, said respect had to be earned.

Daniel Walton, 15, has been excluded from the Cheshire school.

His father Tim, 40, who is jobless, said Daniel was justified to remain seated. Mr Walton, a father of three, said: “I teach my kids respect is earned. He [the head teacher] hasn’t been there long enough to earn my son’s respect so why should he stand up for him?”

Mr Harrison, who took over at the school after the previous head retired with a long-standing neurological condition, said the new rules were to promote high expectations.

He said: “We want students to take pride in their work, in the school and in the community.” However, Mr Harrison said Daniel was not excluded because he refused to stand.

“He has been excluded for four and a half days following an incident in which a member of staff was subjected to verbal abuse and a physical assault,” he said.

“We can’t have children refusing to do what a member of staff is asking them to do.” Nick Seaton, from the Campaign for Real Education, said most parents would support the head.

He said: “Pupils have to respect their teachers otherwise the whole system falls apart. It’s vital that teachers and parents regain their authority from children, a lot of whom seem to think they can do what they like.”

……………..and they wonder why schools and universities are churning out so many deadheads!!!!!

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Bumper Stickers Again

Posted by Boghound on October 22, 2009


 

“Born Free…..Taxed to Death.”
“Conserve toilet paper, use both sides.”
“Don’t come knocking if the car is rocking.”
“Don’t steal….The Government hates Competition.”
“99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.”
“A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.”
“All men are Idiots, and I married their King.”
“Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don’t have film facility.”
“Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.”
“Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW.”
“I love cats…they taste just like chicken.”
“What is a free gift? Aren’t all gifts free?”
“Save Water – Take a bath with your neighbor’s daughter.”
“Some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill.”
“I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.”
“If you are psychic – think HONK.”
“It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats,”
“Keep honking, I’m reloading.”
“Learn from your parents mistakes – use birth control.”
“Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.”
“As long as there are tests, there will be prayers in public schools.”
“Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.”
“Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?”
“Honk if anything falls off.”
“I are proud to be a college student.”

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Hitch A Ride

Posted by Boghound on October 21, 2009


Plane delayed by bird on board

A South Korean passenger jet was grounded just before taking off so that crew members could catch a sparrow that was flying around in the cabin, airline officials said on Wednesday.

“The bird got in through an open airplane door and was spotted during boarding,” said Cho Hyung-chul, a spokesman for Korean Air Line. The passengers on the flight were asked to leave the plane as the airline tried to prevent the bird from taking the domestic flight.

“The bird was captured and set free,” Cho said.

The flight’s 123 passengers were put on board a different plane and sent on their journey, which was delayed for nearly three hours, the airline said.

Birds are a growing problem for the global airline industry, with an increasing number of planes getting damaged after hitting flocks of birds.

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